Oneoffs
by Luvmehatemewantme
Summary: A bunch of One-offs based on Glee involving couples  mostly klaine . Basically, I click shuffle on my ipod and the first song I find I'll write a song-fic/fan-fic about it using characters from Glee. So, yeah, Please read :  So yeah, Please read x
1. One

**One: Misery Business**

**Hey, Hope you like my new story, it's basically going to be a collections of one-offs based on various couples (mostly Klaine) in Glee based on Songs that come up when I click shuffle on my ipod. Please read and comment. Comments make me happy and when I'm happy you get more yaoi, and the more yaoi there is the better the world will be :) So, here it is:**

There's always one person you hate; they think they're better than you, they tease, and bully you and they steal the little you have. All In all, they make you feel worthless.

"When I thought he was mine  
>She caught him by the mouth"<p>

Kurt Hummel hated someone with an unnerving passion – more than David Karofsky. The person who he hated was Drew Knox and for a very simple reason: He stole Kurt's boyfriend.

Actually, he wasn't Kurt's boyfriend (yet) but he liked to think he was. He thought so much about him. His mind was fixated. His mind was fixated on the one and only Blaine Andrews. Blaine was handsome, dark, manly...short. Anyway, he was a gay guy's (and straight girl's) fantasy. He was Kurt's fantasy. But Drew _'Fucking_' Knox had ruined that.

Muttering Ferociously to himself, he marched out of the warbler (yawn, the uneventful, boring, warbler) meeting after he'd decided he had seen enough of Blaine and Drew being, eesh, cute together.

He wanted to be cute with Blaine.

"Just watch my wildest Dreams come true  
>Not one of them involving you"<p>

He went to his room – which he shared with Blaine because the older boy decided that for Kurt to get on well in the new school so far into the year, he'd need a comfortable surrounding with someone he knew well – and Kurt curled up on his bed.

Stomach ache, tears, a deep rib-breaking pounding of his heart. Kurt was in love, again. Kurt was heartbroken, again. However this time it was bigger. It was colossal!

As the final bell of the day strangled to an end (and I mean strangled, to Kurt it sounded like two loud sharp whines finishing with the screams of a cat being strangled to death. Nice.) the door clicked open with a Lazy creak.

"Kurt?" How nice it was to hear Blaine calling his name.

"Hmm...?"

"You left practise and didn't show up to any of your classes."

"Did I? I didn't notice, I might need to see a physician about that," Venom laced with sarcasm oozed out of his mouth. I heard a grumpy sort of thud as the boy sat down. "What did you want to talk about? I assume you want to say something else you wouldn't have gone: "Kurt?""

"I broke up with Drew."

Kurt's ears pricked up and he lifted his body and turned to see Blain perched at the end of his own bed. "Really?" He asked, he sounded too eager and he didn't want that so he craftily coughed to hide his enthusiasm, "Why?"

"He was bad-mouthing you after you left the meeting, he called you an oversensitive pansy who can't take a hint and get over me. I punched him..."

Was he gaping? Kurt was pretty sure his jaw had just gone through the floor.

"Not long after I caught him playing tonsil hockey with an upper-classman," he held his head in his hands – which made Kurt notice that Blaine's dashing curls were coming loose from their prison of gel, "I feel so stupid.

"Because you are."

Blaine Looked up.

Truth hurts.

"You never took notice of my feelings towards you, the fact that I clearly showed that I wanted to be more than friends. You dated someone, my heart felt like it had been ripped out and thrown away, you asked what was up, you believed me when I said "fine"," spilled Kurt, "You told me I made a hot jock and a cute cheerleader, and this was when you was dating Drew. Blaine, you made me fall hard for you even though I knew you weren't single. When you flirted with me, held my hand, I felt like I could fly. Then you'd ignore me and leave with that winning smile as you went to Drew."

"I didn't realise..."

Kurt laughed against his will and wiped away the salty tears, "That's how you're stupid."

Blaine moved over to Kurt, and sat close to him on the bed. First, he lifted up Kurt's irresistibly soft hand, and kissed the fingertips, sending shocks down the younger teen's body. Then he kissed the flushed, tear-stained cheeks. Finally, he kissed the shaking lips and it drove him crazy now he knew what he'd been missing.

He tasted so delicious. Kurt's cherry lip gloss was divine and Blaine wanted more and more and more until their lips were numb.

"I hope you like stupid people who can't realise their true feelings," he smiled hopefully.

Kurt laughed, reaching up and twisting a curl around his finger, "I most certainly do Blain Andrews."

"Coz God, it feels so,  
>It Just feels so good."<p> 


	2. Two

**Two: peacock**

**Hey! This one is based on Katy Perry's Song 'Peacock' and yeah, that's pretty much it. If you've heard the song you'll understand how implicit (and wonderful) it is. Again I did the shuffle thingy on my ipod but this time I also needed a pee really bad at the time, and thats when I get all my good ideas (apparently). Hope you like it, Please comment :) :) :) I'll love you forever and I'll make more wondeful Yaoi BXB Slash for you :) :) :) Also, if you have any pairings you want me to write about or any songs to suggest then please tell me, so far these songs have been from clicking shuffle on my ipod (I'm still waiting for one of my 50's 60's songs to come up or one of my wizard rock - which you should totally check out;The Whomping Willows, The Remus Lupins and The Ministry Of Magic are my faves - and then I really wouldn't know what to write. . ANYWAY, here it is: **

"Word On The Street,  
>You've got something to show me."<p>

Kurt Hummel gaped at the suggestive boys circled around him, there lecherous grins were almost mocking. He stuttered: "You really expect me to own a pair of Daisy Dukes?"

"You are _Kurt Hummel_, the fashionista of Dalton Boy's Academy, the only boy we know who owns a kilt and various mini-skirts," Wes (a friend of Blaine's, and unfortunately a friend of mine) said. He pulled Kurt close to him, wrapping an arm awkwardly around the petite boy, "Please, Kurt, It'll make our day and you know you'll enjoy it too."

"I really do want to see that boy in an un-dapper mode..." Mused Kurt, he chewed the inside of his lip, "Okay then, but you guys are singing back up."

Practising the song was fun, having to strut to the Warbler meeting in daisy dukes and gladiator sandals, however, was not. No matter how much of an anti-bullying school it was, Kurt still received looks of bemusement, bafflement, and could hear stifled giggles from Dalton Boy's that still remained in the corridors. This was torture. Kurt was just glad that he had naturally hairless legs and a mighty-fine ass.

Oh god, if his dad could see him now...

He pulled his blazer tighter – which probably made the outfit worse because it hid away the shorts – and reached out to the door handle before enabling access into the meeting room, but then paused as nerves took over.

"Deep breaths Kurt," he muttered to himself. A hand rested on his shoulder and Kurt almost jumped out of his skin. Then he turned to see David who was smirking.

"You know Kurt, I almost thought you were a girl then," he said. Blushing, the younger boy shrugged. He squeezed his shoulder, "Come on then." David took hold of the handle, covering the nervous boy's shaking hand. "This is going to be a blast. Oh, and take you Blazer off."

So, he did, revealing a cute, loose top that hung off his shoulders and exposed a slimmer of porcelain white skin (he had brought it two sizes too big and adjusted it) The top was from a production team called Starkid and it had a quote on it from a musical parody of theirs based on Harry Potter, it said: "Supermegafoxyawesomehot" and Kurt thought it, sort of, suited the occasion.

"Let's get this show on the road Hummel (and get Blaine absolutely steamed up in every way possible)."

This was possibly going to end up disastrous. Kurt was even thinking about the possibilities of running away, back to Mckinley and suffer the wrath of Karofsky then the embarrassment he was about to endure.

Oh god, it was more embarrassing then when his dad caught him dancing to single ladies in that (hidden in the back of his wardrobe, with his cheerleading uniform, in a box, never to be seen in broad daylight again) outfit.

"These, booty shorts are so going in that box," he mumbled to himself as he walked across the warbler meeting room, his head held down, staring intently at the floor.

Wes squeezed his shoulder, "This is going to be so fun Kurt."

Kurt gulped; he hoped it was going to be fun.

If Kurt hadn't already gotten the warblers – who weren't back-ups – attention, Wes and Dave sure had as he called "One and all" to enjoy the "festivities laid out before them in the form of Kurt Hummel and the engaging song, by the one and only Katy Perry, Peacock."

Blaine, an absolute Katy Perry fan turned around at this point, and his eyes almost popped out as he saw Kurt's invigorating outfit. Even his hair had been styled, or should I say, not styled as it had that absolutely sexy out-of-bed look.

The music started and as did the performance.

"I want the jaw dropping, eye popping, head turning, body shocking  
>(Uh, uh, oh, Uh, uh, uh, oh)<br>I want my heart throbbing, ground shaking, show stopping, amazing  
>(Uh, uh, oh, Uh, uh, uh, oh)"<p>

Kurt trailed around, strutting his stuff, imitating some of the dance moves Katy Perry did on her Music Video, and just like he had been told to do he walked to Blaine and sat on his lap. Boy, was his face red, it had bypassed several shades of pink and went right to beetroot.

"Are you brave enough to let me see your peacock?  
>What you're waiting for, it's time for you to show it off"<p>

He turned, straddling Blaine, watching the boy as he got all hot and flustered. Even the other Warblers had joined in, they wanted a piece of the glory as they got Blaine absolutely un-dapperfied, and they knew Blaine was the jealous type.

A strong athletic boy pulled Kurt up, almost had him soaring in the air, pulling him off Blaine.

Kurt, relieved at the response he had received smirked, he turned as soon as the boy had him settled on the ground, grabbing the boy by his tie.

"Don't be a shy kinda guy I'll bet it's beautiful  
>Come on baby let me see<br>Whatchu hidin' underneath."

He bobbed down then back up, he didn't touch anything but if he did it was just a gentle brush. He started moving around the over Warblers, they were only too happy to let Kurt have his dirty dancing ways with them.

Finally, they all gathered in the middle, Blaine watching intently, the other Warblers amused as they saw his jaw plummet to the ground. Kurt crouched, legs apart, slapping his thighs as many of the girls' used to do in his old glee club.

"I wanna see your peacock, cock, cock  
>Your peacock, cock<br>Your peacock, cock, cock  
>Your peacock."<p>

The light-brown haired boy almost fell to the ground in exhaustion, his cheeks were flushed and his breathing was hasty. Doubled over, a hand on his hip, Kurt managed to ask Blaine a very serious question: "So, Blaine, what did you think? Or would you like another showing?"

Blaine stumbled over worlds, still red in the face and he felt so hot he could have eggs fried upon his skin. "I...well, it was... What I mean to say is...Those shorts...Katy Perry...and –"

The Warblers were laughing heartedly around him, and then he saw the looks on Wes and David's face. Obviously they had put Kurt up to this.

"And that's how we un-dapperfy Blaine Andrews," sniggered one of the upper-classmen –

Who had been in on the act from the beginning.

Wes and David high-tenned each other with huge grins on their faces.

Blaine left the room without another word and Kurt followed without Hesitations.

"Blaine, wait up," he called.

The boy with his hair gelled down to the point of no return turned on his heels, scowling.

"You know," Admitted Kurt with a blush, "I think you're really cute when you're not dapper."

He walked up to the frozen boy, wrapping his arms around his neck, twisting fallen curls in his fingers. The soft look in the green of his eyes almost made Blaine's knees buckle and give way.

"Honestly, I thought," he looked down at the styled top Kurt was wearing, "I thought you looked supermegafoxyawesomehot."

Kurt planted a kiss on his lips, "Good because it was all for you Mr. Andrews."

Blaine took another kiss, this time it was longer and sweeter and a whole lot friskier as Blaine pushed Kurt onto a wall. He licked his bottom lip begging for entrance and Kurt opened his lips slightly. Soon Blaine's tongue was exploring the younger boy's mouth and it felt so good. The friction of the tongues, the hot wetness of it. It got a bit sloppy as Blaine's hands explored Kurt's body, finding the perfectly sculptured hips. In all the hot steaminess, Kurt's canine caught, and cut, Blaine's lip drawing coppery pennies.

"You're bleeding," Kurt said before lapping it up, "Sorry."

Blaine moaned as Kurt's tongue traced patterns upon his skin and then as he bit Blaine's earlobe.

"Maybe we should go to our room," He panted.

Kurt laughed gently, " Yeah Maybe."

With all the heated kisses, and wondering hands, it was a surprise that they made it to their bedroom, but it was worth it. So, worth it.

"Oh good no exaggeration  
>Now all this time was worth the waiting<br>I just shared a tear  
>I'm so unprepared<br>You've got the finest Architecture  
>And on the rainbow looking treasure<br>Such a sight to see  
>And it's all for me."<p> 


End file.
